When I started doing this mock drafts, I wasn’t thinking about the fame or the glory. I wasn’t thinking about the woman that would start throwing themselves at me, only for me to politely decline. I wasn’t thinking about being the voice of a generation. Rather, I was just some high school kid who liked watching the draft and who wanted to spread my passion. But here we are today-my 10th Mock Draft, and I’ve never been more #humble than I am rn. I am the G.O.A.T. when it comes to this shit, and the most respected name in the biz. We’ve seen my flawless mock drafts year after year, and I have no one to thank but myself. There was one guy who used to talk shit, and he hasn’t been heard from in some time, so keep that in mind you question my picks. Anyway, enough of my humbleness, let’s get into this biotch.
1. Cleveland Browns: Josh Allen, QB, Wyoming
2. New York Football Giants: Saquon Barkley, RB, Penn State
3. New York Jets: Baker Mayfield, QB, Oklahoma
4. TRADE-Buffalo Bills: Sam Darnold, QB, USC
5. Denver Broncos: Bradley Chubb, EDGE, NC State
6. Indianapolis Colts: Roquan Smith, LB, Georgia
7. Tampa Bay Buccaneers: Derwin James, S, Florida State
8. Chicago Bears: Quinton Nelson, G, Notre Dame
9. San Francisco 49ers: Minkah Fitzpatrick, S, Alabama
10. Oakland Raiders: Tremaine Edmunds, LB, Virginia Tech
11. Miami Dolphins: Josh Rosen, QB, Orthodox Hebrew College of Greater Los Angeles
12. Cleveland Browns: Denzel Ward, CB, Ohio State
13. Washington Indian Reservation Tribal Members: Tevita Tuliakiono Tuipuloto Mosese Va’hae Faletau Vea, DL, Washington
14. Green Bay Packers: Jaire Alexander, CB, Louisville
15. Arizona Cardinals: Calvin Ridley, WR, Alabama
16. Baltimore Ravens: Sony Michel, RB, Georgia
17. Los Angeles Super Chargers: Da’Ron Payne, DL, Alabama
18. Seattle Seahawks: Josh Jackson, CB, Iowa
19. Dallas Cowboys: Courtland Sutton, WR, SMU
20. Detroit Lions: Taven Bryan, DL, Florida
21. Cincinnati Bengals: Harold Landry, EDGE, Boston College
22. Cleveland Browns: Maurice Hurst, DL, Michigan
23. New England Patriots: Lamar Jackson, QB, Louisville
24. Carolina Panthers: DJ Chark, WR, LSU
25. Tennessee Titans: Sam Hubbard, DE, Ohio State
26. Atlanta Falcons: Billy Price, G, Ohio State
27. New Orleans Saints: Marcus Davenport, EDGE, UTSA
28. Pittsburgh Steelers: Leighton Vander Esch, LB, Boise State
29. Jacksonville Jaguars: DJ Moore, WR, Maryland
30. Minnesota Vikings: Will Hernandez, G, UTEP
31. New England Patriots: Mike Hughes, CB, UCF
32. Philadelphia Eagles: Derrius Guice, RB, LSU
• Josh Allen is the right pick for Cleveland. By drafting Allen, the Browns have ensured that they’ll have the number one overall pick for years to come.
• I had trouble finding the right player for the Raiders due to the disappointing lack of prospects facing serious felony charges.
• The Colts passing on a QB at number 6 all but ensures that Andrew Luck is 100% healthy. There’s no doubt in my mind that he’ll be practicing by Week 11.
• I think the Packers really should consider taking a quarterback in Round 1 with season two of Netflix’s Making a Murderer coming out this fall. The truth will finally come out.
• Don’t be surprised if the Patriots end up trading one of their first rounders for a proven wide receiver (Brandin Cooks?)
RED FLAG ALERTS
Let’s look at some of the players who would be drafted higher if not for off the field concerns.
• Antonio Callaway, Florida: Callaway was almost charged with felony sexual assault, but he had a rock solid alibis. Callaway stated that he was too high to have want to have sex with anyone. NFL players are routinely drug tested though, and without marijuana to control his libido, there’s no telling what Callaway will do.
• Derrius Guice, LSU: Guice had a rough week at the Combine. Not only was he asked if his mother was a whore, but he was apparently so flamboyant and high maintenance that teams had to ask him if he was gay. I’m all for giving these young men second chances, but unlike his mother, Guice clearly doesn’t have what it takes to be a professional. He’s completely off my board. On the plus side, you have to believe that he has good ball skills.
• Derwin James, Florida State: He was a top prospect who played at Florida State. There’s skeletons in his closet somewhere.
• Shaquem Griffin, UCF: He should be fine character wise in the pros as long as he doesn’t go to Tampa Bay. Can you imagine him hanging out with Jason Pierre-Paul? The results would be disastrous.
Biggest Busts: Josh Allen, Baker Mayfield, Denzel Ward, Tremaine Edmunds, Rashaan Evans
Biggest Sleepers: Ronald Jones II, Nick Chubb, Malik Jefferson, Mike White, Luke Falk
Best Name: Poona Ford
Poona Ford not only has a great name, but he’s got scrappy written all over him. He’s a 5’11 defensive tackle.
Mr. Irrelevant Prediction-Siran Neal, S, Jacksonville St
And there you have it, folks.